


the power of small spaces

by rocknerd



Category: Hunter X Hunter
Genre: Dialogue-Only, Elevators, Trapped In Elevator, Why Did I Write This?
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-08-02
Updated: 2018-08-02
Packaged: 2019-06-20 17:02:10
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 631
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15538905
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rocknerd/pseuds/rocknerd
Summary: Stuck in an elevator for an hour too many, three psychos sniff each other out through a series of juvenile icebreakers.





	1. 3.03pm

3.03pm. The lift breaks down. Pariston decides to make idle conversation. 

“Good morning” 

“It’s three in the afternoon.”

“Details, details. Good morning to you, Hisoka!”

“Huh?”

“He doesn’t understand the concept of time.”

“I see.”

“That’s rather unfair of you, Illumi.”

“The truth is often unfair.”

“Waxing poetic won’t heal my wounds.”

“I have not touched you.”

“I think he’s referring to emotional wounds.”

“Those cannot be assessed by any credible metric. They are therefore invalid.”

“Invalidating my woes so easily! There’s no need to twist the knife around like that.”

“I don’t use knives.”

A sound of realisation. “You really don’t. I take it they’re too pedestrian for you?”

“No, just useless. Close combat may work for you, Hisoka, but it is an inefficient assassination method.”

“Gentlemen, the knife is metaphorical.”

“You’ve picked the wrong person to play that game with, Pariston.”

“Is that so? I thought the Zoldycks would be well-versed in that sort of thing.”

“A stupid assumption to make. Illumi can barely compute sarcasm.”

“Why am I being referred to indirectly?”

“Because talking to you is a drag.”

“Hmm, that’s a first.”

“Surely people don’t compliment you on your charisma?”

“They don’t need to. I am aware of it and actively keep it under strict surveillance.”

“You’re a funny guy. I see why Hisoka hangs out with you.”

“We’re occasional allies. Nothing more.”

“So defensive. That’s quite a statement coming from the lone wolf of the Hunter Association.”

“Spare me the cringeworthy titles.”

"Sure."

“…”

“…”

“What constitutes as cringeworthy? Killua often uses this word. I am yet to grasp the implication.”

“It’s basically second-hand embarrassment.”

“Why would you feel embarrassed for the deeds of another?”

“I know it’s hard for you to get, but there’s this thing called empathy…”

“You’re both sociopaths, what would you know of empathy?”

“If I’m a sociopath, you’re a-“

“Psychopath, I am aware. I have taken the appropriate testing materials to conclude this.”

“You know you’re a lunatic?”

“I wouldn’t use a crude word like that, but essentially, yes.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the heckity heck is this? I'm sick of writing internal monologues so this is a lazy attempt to improve character dialogue. 
> 
> I also love the elevator trope with all my heart, regardless of how dated the concept is. 
> 
> Thanks for reading! Feedback is much appreciated.


	2. 5.03pm

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> two truths and a lie.

“How long have we been stuck in here?”

“Two hours.”

“Why not break out?”

“Why waste energy?”

“Aren’t you wasting time?”

“I have nothing to do.”

“The truth is, you enjoy company.”

“Company is pointless unless there is a common goal.”

“Then why are you talking to me?”

“I am clarifying your misunderstanding.”

“Why don’t we play a game?”

“What game?”

“So you _do_ enjoy our company!”

“He does have a point, Illumi. That reaction was hardly detached.”

“Noted. I will refrain from similar behaviour in the future. I do not wish to give off such an impression.”

“What was the game?”

“Ah, we’re all playing, are we? Sorry to disappoint, but I was thinking of something rather juvenile.”

“Does it involve genitals?”

“What? No, sadly not.”

“Then I am willing to partake.”

“Why is “genitals” the line you refuse to cross?”

“Sexual components create complications.”

“Are you admitting to having human needs?”

“I have never denied this.”

“You haven't accepted it either."

“Two Truths and One Lie”

“What?”

“That’s the name of the game.”

“Is this is a torture game?”

“Depends on your definition. I, for one, find it a rather tame icebreaker.”

A sharp, cold reply. “Two hours has been icebreaker enough.”

“Clearly not.”

“Alright, I’ll go first.”

“You know how to play this?”

“It’s pretty self-explanatory.”

“Are there no rules or limitations?”

“Would you prefer to have them?”

“It doesn’t matter what I prefer. Is or is there not a code of conduct for this game?”

“Since you asked so nicely, I’ll give you my favourite rule: One wrong answer and you must remove one article of clothing.”

“I have already established that I refuse to involve myself with genitalia.”

A blinding smile. “Then it’s simple: pick the right answer.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ???? why are you reading this garbage???


End file.
